This problem affects most Adobe fonts (Adobe, are you listening?). I don’t use xetex enough to know what can be done about it in xetex, but in luatex you can write a feature file to adjust the kerning without editing the font itself. It’s much easier than it sounds. E.g.,
\documentclass[12pt]{article}
\usepackage[french]{babel}
\usepackage{filecontents,fontspec,microtype}
\begin{filecontents*}{minion.fea}
languagesystem DFLT dflt;
languagesystem latn dflt;
feature kern {
pos \quoteright \a 10;
pos \quoteright \eacute 10;
pos \quoteright \o 10;
} kern;
\end{filecontents*}
\setmainfont{Minion Pro}[
FeatureFile={minion.fea}]
\frenchspacing
\begin{document}
l’étranger
d’accord
d’ores et déjà
\end{document}

You just have to keep adding lines like pos \quoteright \e 10; until you’ve listed anything that may come after the apostrophe. You can play with the value until you have it as tight or loose as you like: 1, 10, 20…
If you’re writing a bilingual document and the other language requires tighter kerning (off hand, I don’t know of one), you can specify to which language the features you define should apply. That’s more work, but the technique is explained at tex.stackexchange.com/a/142664/7883.
UPDATE: Since version 2.7 of luaotfload, feature files are no longer supported. See tex.stackexchange.com/a/312160/7883 for a new way to solve this problem.
luatexis an option for you, see https://tex.stackexchange.com/q/3602/7883 on changing the kerning by writing a feature file. – Thérèse Dec 17 '14 at 13:50MinionPropackage (for use withpdflatex) knows the problem and solves it. It ‘would be enough’ to slightly increase the side bearings of the apostrophe character. – Bernard Dec 17 '14 at 17:09