$\def\b{\begin{bmatrix}}\def\e{\end{bmatrix}}$
Are $\b0&0&a&b\\0&0&c&d\\0&0&0&0\\0&0&0&0\e$ and it's transpose, $a,b,c,d\in \Bbb C$ the only nilpotent degree $2$ 'families' of matrices of size $4\times 4$?
I believe they are, but I wanted to verify.
$\def\b{\begin{bmatrix}}\def\e{\end{bmatrix}}$
Are $\b0&0&a&b\\0&0&c&d\\0&0&0&0\\0&0&0&0\e$ and it's transpose, $a,b,c,d\in \Bbb C$ the only nilpotent degree $2$ 'families' of matrices of size $4\times 4$?
I believe they are, but I wanted to verify.
There are more forms. You will do well in considering Jordan blocks and in comparing the minimal polynomial to the characteristic polynomial.
One such example:
$$\begin{bmatrix}0&0&a&0\\0&0&0&0\\0&0&0&0\\0&b&0&0\end{bmatrix}=0_{4\times 4}$$
It's not clear what the post means by "families". I assume it's about $4\times 4$ nilpotent matrices of degree $2$ up to similarity i.e., similarity class of matrices such that $A\neq \mathbf 0$ but $A^2=\mathbf 0$.
Read this answer (and also the question post) for context.
Up to similarity, there are two $4\times 4$ matrices with degree of nilpotence $2$ corresponding to the partitions $2+2$ and $2+1+1$.
$\displaystyle \begin{pmatrix} 0 & 1 & & \\ 0 & 0 & & \\ & & 0 & 1\\ & & 0 & 0 \end{pmatrix} \ \begin{pmatrix} 0 & 1 & & \\ 0 & 0 & & \\ & & 0 & \\ & & & 0 \end{pmatrix}\tag*{}$
All matrices in the described family are similar to one of these.
Note that the blank entries are zeroes.