I read here (Feynmann Lectures, Lecture 42) that "Just as time scales change from place to place in a gravitational field, so do also the length scales. Rulers change lengths as you move around." (Rulers also change as you re-orient them; see footnote 2, in the link.) That reads to me like chemical bonds and other internal forces holding the physical ruler together do not stop it from changing length due to changes in space-time induced by the mass.
However, in cosmology, where all of space is expanding, galaxies become further apart from each other, but an individual galaxy, itself, does not expand (due to the forces that hold it together), people do not expand (also due to the internal forces that hold us together), nor do physical rulers. That is, lengths of physical rulers do not change because of their internal forces. I believe distance, in cosmology, as measured by the physical ruler is called "proper distance", vs "co-moving distance", which does expand as the universe does.
In the first paragraph, the change to space affects the length of the ruler, regardless of the ruler's internal forces but, in the second paragraph, the change to space does not affect the ruler because of the ruler's internal forces. I am confused regarding why the physical ruler's internal forces do not prevent length change in the first paragraph, but do in the second. After all, in both cases, space is changing in a way that affects length or distance. Maybe the reason is that the type of change to space is different since in one case it is caused by matter and in the other case it is caused by dark energy?