BibLaTeX not working with MikTeX, TeXMaker

Question

I am using the latest version of both MikTeX and TexMaker (fresh install about two weeks ago). I am getting very frustrated because I am completely unable to use BibLatex in any of my documents. Here's an MWE:

\documentclass[]{article}
\usepackage[utf8]{inputenc}
\usepackage{amsmath}
\usepackage[english]{babel}
\usepackage{csquotes,textcomp}
\usepackage{mathrsfs}
\usepackage[backend=biblatex,style=numeric]{biblatex}
\addbibresource{citelist.bib}

\title{An examination of two dimensional direct and indirect excitons}
\author{Matthew Brunetti}

\begin{document}
...
Words.~\cite{zaslow2d}
...
\printbibliography
\end{document}

My citelist.bib has the correct form:

@article{zaslow2d,
    author =    "Zaslow, B.",
    author =    "Zandler, Melvin E.",
    title =     "Two-Dimensional Analog to the Hydrogen Atom",
    journal =   "Am. J. Phys.",
    year =      "1966"
}

....

It should also be noted that typing \cite{ does cause TexMaker to bring up an autocomplete form with all of my citation entries that can be found in citelist.bib. Also, I have tried using both the biber and biblatex backends with no success. I have used the MikTex package manager to install and update the Biblatex package and the biber package.

When I try to build the PDF using pdflatex + biblatex + pdflatex x2, I receive I multitude of errors, including, "use of sort list doesn't match its definition", on the line containing \end{abstract}, multiple "undefined control sequence. " on a line containing \begin{eqnarray}`, warnings that my citations are undefined (even though, as I said, TexMaker knows they're there and offers to autocomplete them for me), "warning: empty bibliography", and so on.

Is Biblatex simply not compatible with TexMaker and MikTex on Windows 10? How can I fix this?

EDIT: I have made the changes found in the three comments below but am still unable to compile the document. Here is the beginning of the document:

    \documentclass[]{article}
    \usepackage[utf8]{inputenc}
    \usepackage{amsmath}
    \usepackage[english]{babel}
    \usepackage{csquotes,textcomp}
    \usepackage{mathrsfs}
    \usepackage{multirow}
    \usepackage[margin=0.75in]{geometry}
    \usepackage{graphicx}
    \graphicspath{ {images/} }

    \usepackage[backend=biber,style=numeric,sortlist=nty]{biblatex}
    \addbibresource{citelist.bib}

    \title{(Title)}
    \author{(name)}

    \begin{document}
    \nocite{*}

    \maketitle

    \begin{abstract}

And at the bottom I have:

    \printbibliography{citelist.bib}  (line 315)

    \end{document}

When I run only Biber, using the directions found in (this link)[Biblatex with Biber: Configuring my editor to avoid undefined citations, the process runs normally. When I try to then quick build with pdflatex + biblatex + pdf latex X2, I get the following errors: package keyval error: sortlist undefined [many equation cross references undefined] line 315: empty bibliography please rerun biber on the file: (biblatex) "(name of this file)" (biblatex) and rerun latex afterwards

I still do not understand what I'm doing wrong, or why these errors are appearing and how to fix them. Please help. I've been struggling with this for almost a week and it's driving me insane.

EDIT 2: My document compiles and displays PDF output when I run the following MWE at sharelatex.com. I still get the error message about the keyval package which still makes no sense to me.

EDIT 3: I will be posting (what I hope to be) relevant data from my .log file, found below:

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/biblatex.sty
    Package: biblatex 2016/03/03 v3.3 programmable bibliographies (PK/JW/AB)

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/biblatex_.sty
    Package: biblatex_ 2016/03/03 v3.3 programmable bibliographies (biber)                 (PK/JW/A
    B)

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/oberdiek/kvoptions.sty
    Package: kvoptions 2011/06/30 v3.11 Key value format for package options         (HO)

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/generic/oberdiek/kvsetkeys.sty
    Package: kvsetkeys 2012/04/25 v1.16 Key value parser (HO)

    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load biblatex default data model...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'blx-dm.def' found.

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/blx-dm.def)
    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load biblatex style data model...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'numeric.dbx' not found.
    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load biblatex custom data model...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'biblatex-dm.cfg' not found.

    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load compatibility code...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'blx-compat.def' found.

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/blx-compat.def
    File: blx-compat.def 2016/03/03 v3.3 biblatex compatibility (PK/JW/AB)
    )
    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load generic definitions...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'biblatex_.def' found.

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/biblatex_.def
    File: biblatex_.def 
    \c@textcitecount=\count285
    \c@textcitetotal=\count286
    \c@textcitemaxnames=\count287
    \c@biburlnumpenalty=\count288
    \c@biburlucpenalty=\count289
    \c@biburllcpenalty=\count290
    \c@smartand=\count291
    )
    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load bibliography style 'numeric'...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'numeric.bbx' found.

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/bbx/numeric.bbx
    File: numeric.bbx 2016/03/03 v3.3 biblatex bibliography style (PK/JW/AB)
    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load bibliography style 'standard'...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'standard.bbx' found.

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/bbx/standard.bbx
    File: standard.bbx 2016/03/03 v3.3 biblatex bibliography style (PK/JW/AB)
    \c@bbx:relatedcount=\count292
    \c@bbx:relatedtotal=\count293
    ))
    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load citation style 'numeric'...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'numeric.cbx' found.

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/cbx/numeric.cbx
    File: numeric.cbx 2016/03/03 v3.3 biblatex citation style (PK/JW/AB)
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\cite'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\parencite'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\footcite'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\footcitetext'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\smartcite'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\supercite'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\textcite'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\textcites'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\cites'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\parencites'.
    Package biblatex Info: Redefining '\smartcites'.
    )
    Package biblatex Info: Trying to load configuration file...
    Package biblatex Info: ... file 'biblatex.cfg' found.

    (c:/texlive/2015/texmf-dist/tex/latex/biblatex/biblatex.cfg
    File: biblatex.cfg 
    )

    *File List*
    biblatex.sty    2016/03/03 v3.3 programmable bibliographies (PK/JW/AB)
    biblatex_.sty    2016/03/03 v3.3 programmable bibliographies (biber) (PK/JW/AB)
    biblatex-dm.cfg
    blx-compat.def    2016/03/03 v3.3 biblatex compatibility (PK/JW/AB)
    biblatex_.def   

FINAL EDIT: Thanks to everyone who tried helping me with this. I understand why this question should be closed since I changed my LaTeX distribution from miktex to texlive. I have all but abandoned BibLaTeX in favor of the amsrefs package and the bibdiv environment. It worked with no issues on my first try and appears to have all the same functionality as biblatex claimed, specifically self-contained bibliography files and organized citation entry with simple reference keys.

Again, thanks for all your help. Cheers!